AWESOME Fall Recipe!

I've had lots of conversations with friends who are down right bored with their own cooking. I seem to go through waves of being either bored or inspired. After cooking dinner tonight I feel like I could be headed for inspiration again! :-) I prepped this while the kids had lunch and then let it cook all afternoon. I ended up forgetting the onions and messing up the sauce and it was still phenomenal! Delish!

Here it is! (Sorry no pix)

Rosemary-Orange Pork Roast with Acorn Squash and Sweet Potatoes
Weight Watchers "Easy Week Night Recipes" (produced by Oxmoor House)
WW Points: 8 per serving (3 oz Pork and 1/2 Cup Vegetable Mixture)

1 small acorn squash, peeled, seeded, and cut into 2 inch pieces
2 medium sweet potatoes, peeled and cut into 2-inch pieces
1 cup chopped onion
1 1/2 teaspoons black pepper
1 teaspoon salt (I use Kosher)
1 (3 pound) boneless pork loin roast, trimmed
1 tablespoon olive oil
1 1/2 cups low-sugar orange marmalade
3/4 cup fat-free, less-sodium chicken broth
1/4 cup orange juice
2 tablespoons chopped fresh rosemary
2 tablespoons cornstarch
2 tablespoons water
Rosemary sprigs (optional)

Directions:
1. Place squash, potatoes, and onion in a 5-quart electric slow cooker.

2. Cook pepper and salt; rub mixture over pork. Heat oil in a large skillet over medium-high heat; add pork, browning on all sides. Place pork in cooker on top of vegetables.

Combine marmalade and next 3 ingredients in a medium bowl; pour mixture over pork and vegetables.

4. Cover and cook on LOW 5 hours

5. Remove pork to a serving platter; cover and keep warm. Combine cornstarch and water in a small bowl, stirring with a wishk until smooth; stir into veetables in cooker. Increase heat to High; Cook 20 minutes or until sauce is thick. Spoon sauce over pork. Garnish with Rosemary springs, if desired. Yield 12 servings.

Cal. 354; Fat 12.9g; Fiber 1.5g

Abby's First Year

Abigail Elizabeth Graham

May 30, 2010 - One year old

One of the gifts of being a full time mom is having space for an inward thought life. Recently those thoughts have been crowded with memories and reflections of our daughter's first year. A few days ago I was asked if it was a fast year. Is there a parent alive who answers "no" to that question? Wasn't it just a few weeks ago that I was meeting her for the first time and trying to decide if it had been worth it to have her naturally? (yes, it was) Does my little baby have to become a little girl? Or, is it that I can't wait for her to become a little girl? Amazing how those desires can exist simultaneously! This year with Abby has been absolutely delightful. I have not forced the more difficult days from my memory, but there is no question that Abigail has brought delight to our family. As we celebrate this first birthday, I praise the Lord that He chose us to be her parents and wait with great expectation to see what the Lord has in store for this precious daughter of His.

Reflections on this year...

Random Strangers:"Oh, your kids are so cute! How old are they?"
Me: "Almost two and six months"
Random Strangers: [pause]"Oh wow!! You must be busy!" (read...so that's why you look tired)

I am laughing even as I type that out, because it encompasses a significant and very real aspect of this year. While Noah changed my perception of "time," Abby changed my perception of "energy." Despite the fact that Abby has always been a fairly "easy" baby, the first two months of life together were completely overwhelming. It was critical that I manipulate nap times so that they would not hit at the exact same time or Noah would end up screaming from his bedroom unable to understand that Abby needed me more in that moment. Additionally, all of my work to be sure I would have a plan for sleep training went out the window when met with the reality of an infant, an eighteen month old, a house to pack, and a move to organize. The preparation proved to be helpful eventually, but for a while I just felt really guilty that I was allowing myself to use sleep props. Then one merciful day, God sent me the angel I needed - a friend from my mom's group with a meal and words of grace. She validated my struggles and reminded me that it would come together AFTER I moved. She talked about her own experience with two under two and reassured me that after a couple months it would get better. I cried a lot during those early days, but less after her visit.

She was right. It did get better. Around two months I began to settle into my role as mom of two, and Abby felt less fragile. For you Babywise moms...around three months I started getting serious about sleep training. I had kept her on a three hour cycle all along but I had to break some bad habits. After nine days of hardcore focus and a ton of prayer we had major progress. By four months she was sleeping through the night with 3 1/2 naps a day. I remember vividly the change that our whole family went through once she started sleeping better. As her world became more organized and pleasant so did our family life. Now, at the end of this first year it is work to remember those early days; I am less lazy, and more resourceful. It is delightful watching Noah learn to be a big brother. He is usually nurturing to her and very helpful to me. Sure...he did love to drag her around by her legs...but it didn't help that Abby would just lay there and GIGGLE!

Once we passed the sleep training phase life with Abigail became more simple. Milestones passed so quickly. By five months she was commando crawling, six months she was crawling full speed after her brother and starting solids. At seven months she started feeding herself, eating her peas and carrots with as much enthusiasm as bananas and blueberries. Not much later she was beginning to talk. Her first word/phrase was "all done" followed by "up" and "okay." By nine months she was starting to pull to standing and began to cruise. She is now a proficient cruiser, learning to balance and let go of the furniture. Walking is not far away. I am not sure how much of the seamlessness of her first year is reality and how much is that my attention has been more divided. It is definitely true that I have not been as eager for Abby to grow up. From day one there has been a sweetness to Abby that I treasure deeply. It is selfish of me, I know, but I have just wanted to bottle up these pre-boundary testing days and keep them forever.

The Party...

Anticipating her birthday we decided to go to West Virginia for a big family party. As is well known by now, my parents are retiring at the end of this year and their house is already on the market. Nick's parents, sisters, our two nieces, a significant portion of the Goodson family, and Aunt Meghan and Uncle Jeremy joined us for an amazing celebration! It was just the kind of event that has defined many of my most significant memories at that house - church picnics, birthday parties, various gatherings with friends, holidays, and most importantly, my wedding.

Abby was totally engaged in opening her gifts, ate her cupcake with gusto, and played joyfully with her aunts, uncles, cousins, grandparents, and great grandparents. As we saw off the last of our family I sought out a quiet space in our backyard and tried not to think about the fact that one day it won't be my backyard to come back to....

In the meantime, Abby's life now has a special story in that beautiful space. Hopefully we will have a few more before the house sells. :-)

Below are a few special things about Abby to know. As always you can keep up with our family life at http://www.flickr.com/photos/heidigraham. Thank you for reading and celebrating with us!

Abigail...

loves to snuggle - climbs all over Noah when possible - smiles and giggles relentlessly - climbs up and down stairs - eats vegetables - likes to move - babbles expressively - initiated peek-a-boo on her own - has seven teeth - adapts well to change - is in the 90th percentile for height - sleeps 12 hours at night - says mama and dada - is not very fond of grass

Growth Spurts....Not Just for Kids

Yesterday was a very hard day with Noah. His emotions were out of control. It felt like a surprise attack. By nap time my patience was wafer thin, by the time Nick got home, my emotional state was starting to reflect Noah's (and vice versa). I escaped after dinner for a cooling off period of unsatisfying retail therapy, Nick got the kids in bed, and then we settled into a "situation room" dialogue evaluating what had happened and discussing next steps.

I came to Starbucks for my writing date, intending to discuss what we learned, what we are trying, and what is working. But before I started to write I opened my Bible:

"Unless the Lord builds the house, its builders labor in vain. Unless the Lord watches over the city, the watchmen stand guard in vain. In vain you rise early and stay up late, toiling for food to eat - for he grants sleep to those he loves." Psalm 127: 1-2

My heart is not proud. Oh Lord, my eyes are not haughty; I do not concern myself with great matters or things too wonderful for me. But I have stilled and quieted my soul; like a weaned child with its mother, like a weaned child is my soul within me. O Israel, put your hope in the Lord both now and forevermore." Psalm 131

How I needed to hear those words tonight. My eyes are haughty and my heart is proud. I labor and toil endlessly to understand how to be the best parent I can be. I am in many capacities what Kevin Leman refers to as a "Super Parent" in his book "Making Children Mind Without Losing Yours." My way of coping with both failures and uncertainties as a parent is to research until I am so overwhelmed that Nick has to step in, close the computer, take my book away, and remind me to take a break. Honestly, I think that research does a lot of good. The difference in Noah yesterday and Noah today is almost unfathomable. But! As a friend of mine is often saying, "I need to let the Lord show me how to take care of my kids" All the research in the world will be fruitless if I am not asking God to show me the needs of my children, to quiet my heart, and give me the strength, creativity, and energy to train the children the Lord blessed us with as HE desires them to be trained.

I appreciate that Solomon wrote in his psalm that "He [the Lord] grants sleep to those He loves!" I can not imagine more inspiring, comforting words to mothers and fathers of young children (as well as the majority of western civilization). If I had a commentary with me I would probably discover that the poetic nature of the psalms breathes into this verse broader life and meaning - perhaps that God provides for those He loves. But, in his poetry Solomon said SLEEP, and I'm gonna roll with that for now. Poetic or not, that is a promise that I can totally get on board with! :-)

I have said to a few friends recently that I feel like I'm going through a parenting growth spurt. In only two years I can remember several similar experiences, usually marked by Noah's increasing mobility. These growth spurts always seem like an increased loss in personal freedom. The brat in me rebels and says, "But I want to do X." Our experience with Noah yesterday was just this. I was coming off a day where I didn't get anything done, and what I did accomplish got undone. So I decided I would spend the day trying to feel "accomplished." I engaged Noah where I was able to, took care of necessities, but mostly I just tried do my own thing. HA! The kid can play independently, but he knows when he's being ignored. As a result of our conversation last night we agreed that Noah had too many age INappropriate freedoms, especially regarding the way he spent his day. The ends result being that I needed to structure Noah's day in a way that would be life giving to both of us.

Structuring time is a learned principle, that I utilize when necessary, not something that is naturally freeing for me. Regardless, today I had a plan. We moved from activity to activity (sibling play, free time, room time, music time, art time, outside play, helping mommy time, guided play, etc), and I still managed to get a shower, gets meals ready, have a little personal down time, and by the end of the day I had only responded to about 3 tantrums, all of which were much more short lived. Like a baby fights sleep during a growth spurt, I think I am likely to fight choosing to do this initially, but eventually the baby gives into what she needs and with the Lord's help so will I.

Noah "reading" his pillow - his new favorite room time activity

In the meantime...before I headed out for my evening at Starbucks, Nick and I spent our "family time" tickling, playing games, trying to learn more of Noah's words, and relishing the sound of their giggles, shrieks, and coos. I think I photograph our family so much because I am so afraid of them growing up too fast. I just never want to forget how wonderful we have it with these two beautiful kids! It is good that God gives us several years of letting go incrementally, before we have to release them to adult hood.

Abby in her crib just before I lowered the mattress.
Speaking of growing up too fast....

Thank you for reading!!!

Pure Joy!

Tuesday afternoon mom and I were chatting (as we often do) and she expressed her impatience to see her grandchildren again. I told her I thought she should kidnap dad and just get on the road. Within 2 hours a spontaneous trip was planned and in motion. They arrived a little after midnight and spent two days lavishing their love on our family. It was an absolutely incredible two days. In The Shack we learn that we have relationship with one another, first and foremost because God has relationship within himself in the Trinity. That concept is revolutionary to me! To know that God has not just thrown us into all these messy relationships without a model to follow or hope to get through the more challenging (or even downright awful) moments is incredibly encouraging. Perhaps I am bold to say this, but these last two days seemed to be filled with moments of living out relationship as God intends it - honest, encouraging, full of grace and beauty, intimate, and loving. I am so blessed to have parents who love my children, respect my husband, and are willing to drive six hours just to be part of our daily chaos for two days!
Perhaps one of the most FUN moments was Noah discovering the joy of a pile of leaves. Two year olds are considered "terrible"at least in part because their emotions are so raw and unharnessed. When this is a negative emotion it is frustrating for everyone, but when that emotion is joy...oh if only I could protect the rawness of that joy so that he could carry it with him forever! You can see more images on our flickr website. I realize I have said nothing of Abby, and that is mostly because she is just doing so well. Today she turned 5 months old, and I started her on rice cereal which she readily accepted. She is in her first week of consistently sleeping through the night, which brings the promise of an extended day time schedule not too far away. (For you Babywise parents, we didn't get started until 3 months, and she is now on 3-3.5 hour schedule, 3 naps, and a 75-90 min waketime) She smiles and laughs and communicates constantly! She seems to be passing by milestones much more quickly, and I am sure that is a function of her being a second child. I would wait and wait for Noah to reach a milestone. With Abby it's like I wake up one day and realize "oh she can sit up without much support - COOL!" Nick and I have found ourselves missing (yes really) our Madison winter. NOT because of the snow, but because of the sheer joy we had in being together everyday. I asked him today if he could remember the smell of our home during winter - the smell associated with baking bread, staying in cozy robes until late morning, playing cards, being together all day long as a family. When we have been married for 65 years we will still remember that special winter where God took away our worldly security and gave us the gift of time together. We constantly return to the lessons we learned during those six months of unemployment as we build our life here in Northeast Ohio. I may blog more about those details later, but what is most important is that we continue to be confident that God has brought us here and is unfolding His plan for us. Praise the Lord for his Goodness!

Mommy and Noah date

This has been a wonderful morning! Noah and I went on a date! He had an appointment to get his hair cut, and after a very patient hair dresser finished making sense of his massive head of hair I did a fast Starbucks run to get him his first hot chocolate. We then drove to the town square park to drink our chocolate yummyness and play while waiting for Nick and Abby to join us for lunch at a local coffee shop.
I have to say I really don't understand my son! HE REFUSED HOT CHOCOLATE. He's refused chocolate milk too. I have raised him on such healthy beverage choices that he refuses anything that is sweet. I'm sure I shouldn't complain, but I just can not comprehend it. However, what he did not refuse was any and every opportunity to walk around town, holding my hand and learning about everything he saw. We talked about trees, leaves, trash cans, stairs, the sky, clouds, buildings, crosswalks, cars, trains, flowers, and autumn to name a few. He was so fascinated by everything.

Noah and I both need more days like today to be together learning about each other, enjoying the fall air and crunching leaves. I'm so grateful for my curious, mostly obedient, and genuinely delightful son! And to top it off, as if to thank me for a fun morning outdoors, he actually ate a SANDWICH. Don't laugh. It's not funny. My options for feeding this child lunch have been so hampered by his lack of interest in sandwiches. The door has just swung wide open to more options at meal times. Thank goodness!

Noah says Mama

A special Friendship

One of the more frustrating aspects of my story is that I have very dear friends all over the country. I am grateful to have these friends, but I wish I could keep them all with me. This last month the Lord has shown me the joy of continuing to invest in some of those friendships, and particularly with the woman who was my "best friend" through most of my childhood. I suppose Meghan and I were 8 or 9 years old when we met. That means we went through puberty together, and that in and of itself makes it a miracle that we are still close! :-) We made our lists of guys we liked, played MASH, spent 200 hours trying to put up a tent in our backyard, and that night my mom came and prayed for our future husbands. We also fought and joined different cliques and had our days of not being so nice. I'm not sure how Meghan remembers those moments, all I remember is that sometimes we really got along and sometimes not. I also remember she loved me even though I wasn't one of the "cool kids".

When we went our separate ways for college, I remember wondering what would happen to this precious friendship. As it happened the distance and maturing of the last nearly 10 years has only brought us closer together. And in 2006 we both married our husbands, and celebrated together in the same backyard where years before my mom had prayed. Now she and her husband are Aunt Meghan and Uncle Jeremy to our kids.

A few weeks ago Meghan gave us the greatest gift by taking time to visit us in our new home and help unpack. Noah's typical response to people is a bit of shyness at first, and then very friendly but not affectionate. Meghan came in and he did the shy bit, but within only a couple hours he was crawling in her lap and having the time of his life. It was such a great joy for me to watch their mutual affection!
During our time in Bluefield, Meghan gave me the best gift I could have hoped for - an evening with a friend without kids. We are both longing for more friendship right now, and she pressed me to figure out how to get away for some girl time. For three whole hours I was not responding to diapers, hungry bellies, and discipline issues, but gabbing with a wonderful woman about the struggles and joys of our lives (which of course included some gabbing about the owners of those diapers). I felt lavished by the love of her friendship, and I pray she does as well. I am so grateful for this beautiful woman!